What's With All These Immigrants?

Baby Fatt's scared. Bad scared.

I live in New Mexico (land of mi chante), and I'm frightened about our unsecured border--the one we have with Arizona. What's with these Aryans from Arizona (Aryanzonans?)? Me skerred.

Have you ever been to Arizona? I have, and it sucks. The "Mexican food" is terrible (by the way, if the cops are going to start interrogating Mexicans are the food inspectors going to start showing up in Mexican restaurants and fining the cooks for authenticity?). The climate--don't believe what they all tell you about "but it's a dry heat"--is horrible for human beans. And the culture, as exemplified by Phoenix and personified by Sheriff Joe Arpaio, reminds one of a desert Munich circa 1932.

Arizona has passed a terribly racist, terribly xenophobic law--that allows police to question citizenship--out of ethnic resentment and class rage. I understand that the gringos of Arizona are bereft, alienated, and angry at the powers that be. But their problem is not immigrants--illegal, legal, or extraterrestrial--it is the America that has quashed their dreams in service to Wall Street, the nation that stagnated their wages while the elite get tax cuts. Arizonans should not be angry at immigrants, they should be angry at the oligarchy that has destroyed their aspirations and shackled them to a lifetime of service to various credit card companies.

Meanwhile the Aryans of Arizona have given their Gestapo the power to stop anyone who does not look quite 'merican enuff and ask them to show their papers. "Show me your papers"--isn't that the one line that unites every movie about the Nazis ever made? The people of Arizona are proud of this? WTF?!

New Mexico is mostly Hispanic. Hispanics are about 45 percent of the population; gringos about 41 percent; and the rest Native American, African American, and Asian (in that order). In other words, people who are less than pale are the minority in my beloved state--one of the reasons this is such a great place to live. And the Aryans of Arizona give their police the power to question mi compadres regarding their citizenship?

Many Hispanics from New Mexico have been here since the 16th century--a couple of hundred years before there even was a USA. And the Native Americans have been here for innumerable eons. The oldest continuously settled community in the USA is the Pueblo at Acoma--it's been here for nearly a thousand years. And now some "immigrant" from New Jersey or California thinks that the Pueblo di Mi Chante should be required to show their papers in Arizona? Gimme a break!

Time to just say "no!" to Arizona. Enough of these racist dolts and their shallow pseudo-patriotic worldview (by the way, where are you Tea Party--one would think that when a government oversteps its power the way the State of Arizona has the Tea Party would be the first to arise in libertarian rage and say not only 'no' but 'hell no'?). Time to give these idiots a taste of their own medicine.

Not only should we all boycott Arizona and any products made in Arizona, we should also confront any Arizonans seen outside their little fascist wonderland with the taunt "show me your papers!". Let the gringos of Arizona feel what it's like to have their citizenship and patriotism questioned--just because someone has a white face does not mean he or she is 'merican--let's examine their papers closely first. A failure of vigilance means that the terrorists win. I don't want that, do you?

I thought so. 'nuff of them Aryanzonans.

Tea Bagged!

Now the worm turns. Soon we'll see just how much government the tea baggers can really live without. The Bush economy is doing everything the extreme right could never get done at the ballot box. Good luck to all of us.

All over the country state and municipal governments are cutting budgets. Here in the land of mi chante schools are being closed (and class size increased in the ones remaining open), public employees are being laid off or involuntarily furloughed, services are being cut. The state is proposing closing half of its highway rest stops (tea baggers don't need no restrooms) and it will be fun seeing how tea baggers enjoy waiting in line all day to get a driver's license (or bass fishing license!) or to pay a traffic ticket. This is just the beginning, of course--if you want to see tea bag paradise just go to California, which may soon rival Mississippi in terms of standard of living as government there continues to shrink.

One suspects that the tea baggers are just as reliant upon government as the rest of us. After all, they transport themselves to their little rallies on taxpayer subsidized roadways; many of them are retired (or looking forward to retirement) and receive Social Security (i.e., the most socialized--and effective--government program in the history of humanity) and Medicare (best poster ever from a tea bag rally: 'Keep the government out of my Medicare!'); public employees pick up their trash and clean their streets, etc. So whence do they think comes the infrastructure that makes our economy possible--fat cats on Wall Street? Not, it's the government, acting in service to citizen-taxpayers, that's providing the services responsible for our quality of life.

If tea baggers had either courage or intellectual honesty they would eschew all government in order to live a life that is pure and unadulterated by the taint of big guv'ment. They would live far from any taxpayer subsidized municipality; return any government benefits (just shred those Social Security checks!); and bury all their own trash (who needs those taxpayer funded trash dumps?).

But of course they have neither courage nor honesty. All they have--the essence of their political being--is resentment: an inchoate rage in reaction to a world that is changing all around them (black people get to president? gay people get to marry? WTF?!) and over which they feel they have absolutely no control (it is only on this last point that they are correct). The true target of their anger is not the government--that's a mere surrogate--it's demographics. They cannot accept that their pale skins and old timey white bread views no longer constitute the majority in the diverse nation that the USA has become.

Get used to it tea baggers. It only gets worse from here. You are a shrinking minority and in a generation you'll be to the twenty first century what the Whigs were to the nineteenth. Meanwhile, beware answered prayers, and enjoy your time at the motor vehicle office.